git{}blamed
Because someone has to say it.
SOLIDJS: THE ROAST
One man's eight-year WIP held together by `type TODO = any;`
Dec 10, 2025BOOTSTRAP: A ROAST IN SEVERAL ACTS
14 years of "unfucking" browser bugs, wrapped in 952 Sass variables, authored by someone named "fat", and shipped with empty event listeners that do literally nothing - and it STILL powers half the internet.
Dec 10, 2025THE NEXT.JS ROAST
32,000 commits, 2 critical auth bypasses, 30,000-line font file, 1,252 skipped tests, and a 4-level deep revert chain - it's not a framework, it's a support group with a bundler.
Dec 10, 2025EMBER.JS: A HISTORICAL ROAST
Fourteen years of "clearly broken and weird" code that they "have to keep until the next major at least" - including Math.random() queue names, V8 whispering hacks, and a UUID generator copied from a gist by someone named "selfish."
Dec 10, 2025MOMENT.JS: A POST-MORTEM
A 176KB monument to mutability, shipping Klingon support and IE8 hacks to production while its own maintainers beg you to use literally anything else.
Dec 10, 2025VUE.JS CORE: A ROAST
8,662 commits, 44% from one guy, TODOs from 2020, and a TypeScript codebase with 516 uses of "any" - it's not a framework, it's one man's beautiful, terrifying fever dream that accidentally became the infrastructure for half the internet.
Dec 10, 2025FACEBOOK FLOW: WHAT VERSION IS IT?
The type checker that created an entire module called "Unsoundness" with 12 different flavors of being wrong, wrote "Mwhahahahahaha" into production code, and now has a feature to parse TypeScript syntax because even they've accepted defeat.
Dec 10, 2025